


Unbecoming

by FireflyHannah, godotco



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: A lot - Freeform, Contract, I'm just bad at nsfw, Kevin gets very irritated with Andrew, Kevin needs someone to take control, M/M, Most of it is implied, NSFW, Pining, Post-Canon, mention of guns in the last chapter, not dealing with problems, poorly written bdsm-like situations, safe words, the research was worth it, unsatisfactory support systems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-07-07 06:57:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15903189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FireflyHannah/pseuds/FireflyHannah, https://archiveofourown.org/users/godotco/pseuds/godotco
Summary: Loneliness wasn't something Kevin was accustomed to. He'd never been alone for extended periods of time before. First it was Riko, then it was Andrew.Now, with Riko gone and Andrew focusing far more time on Neil, Kevin feels like he could be drowning in a future alone that he'd never had to deal with before. In a sea of negative feelings, he's drowning.No one expected his lifeboat to come in the form of Ichirou Moriyama.Especially not when his attempt at surviving had been born of desparation and lies that hadn't been fallen for.|| An AFTG Big Bang 2018 contribution with @still-waiting-for-godot on Tumblr: Artwork in chapters 6 and 8 ||





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had no idea how to tag this.
> 
> Anyway! Hi. This is my contribution to the AFTG Big Bang 2018. I'd firstly like to thank my friend for helping me with ideas when I was screaming to him about... everything.
> 
> Secondly, I'd like to thank Jen for putting up with me like... omfg I was terrible. I finished this last night! I got Jen's artwork a week ago! And Jen was just super great to work with and very supportive, even when I hated everything I was writing. Honestly, at some points, I swear I kept some stuff out of spite to myself.
> 
> Anyway! This is the first thing I've written like this in many ways, but mostly the length. I struggled so hard but after a month long writer's block, I managed it, thank goodness.
> 
> So now, if you need me, I'll be hiding from all writing for... a little while.
> 
> Enjoy the fic, I tried hard. ;^;
> 
> ~Firefly~

Kevin approached the door after being waved through by the secretaries that he’d spoken to. He had to swallow the lump down from his throat. This was such a dangerous idea, he knew. He could get killed for this. He was almost expecting to be killed for it. He’d deserve it for being so presumptuous. But that was just it, he had to try. The issue was so pressing that he had to try before the guilt killed him first. At least dying here meant he wouldn’t have to worry about himself being his own demise. This was such a boneheaded, idiot idea that he just couldn’t believe he was doing it. This wasn’t like him, and he was tempted to turn back right now. A shame it was too late for that really. His hand was already raising to the door, knocking sharply, even though he knew the man behind it already knew he was there.

“Enter.”

The voice was sharp, and Kevin wasn’t sure why he was surprised. Of course it was sharp, just like the owner of it. Kevin stepped into the room, gazing around the white and black design that seemed to be following him around the house while he bit his lip sharply, blinking at the sight of the man at a large desk. Turning his back to him for only a moment, against his better judgement, Kevin shut the door with a quiet click, pausing with his hand on the knob before he allowed himself to release a nervous breath before stepping away, trying to force away the tension in his form. He crossed the oversized room to the desk, swallowing roughly as he stared at the man ahead of him. The tension he’d tried to escape only grew as the man stayed silent, watching him with an evenness that was eerily similar to Andrew’s, or an irate Riko’s. Those thoughts made him shudder, but he swallowed back his concerns and took the seat the man gestured to. When it became clear that he was not going to begin the conversation, Kevin took a sharp breath and sighed.

“Lord Moriyama.”

“Kevin Day, what a surprise. I cannot say I was expecting such a visit, were you not on vacation with Wesninski and Minyard?”

“Actually… That’s what I came to discuss…” His voice was, to his credit, more even than he thought it would have been. “Neil… I mean. And Jean.”

The man across from him might’ve straightened up at that, a gleam in dark eyes that let Kevin know he was stepping into dangerous territory. He wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to step into that territory, but he knew he had to try… Right? He had to try and push for this.

“Go on, Day, I do not have all day.”

“I would like them to be released from their debts. It’s my fault they’re even in this situation.”

“How did you work that one out?”

Kevin thought he might’ve heard some dry amusement in his tone then, but it was never wise to take any implication from any Moriyama’s tone unless it was clear that was what they meant, so Kevin exhaled softly, and he began to explain.

“I left the nest before my time was up, and I’m aware my time would never be up, but I left. I left Jean to face Riko’s wrath, knowing he’d be furious when he found out I left, knowing what he’d already done to Jean and barely being able to imagine what he’d do to him when he discovered his betrayals. And then I signed Neil. Well, I insisted Coach Wymack sign Neil. Neil who might’ve been able to run longer, and keep away… I dragged him back into this.”

A slow smile stretched over Lord Moriyama’s face. He chuckled, a low, disturbing sound that didn’t quite sound right. The mirth, of course, came from what he’d just heard. He couldn’t fault Kevin’s ever skewed logic. It was just so wrong it was laughable to him. How could Kevin Day get something so wrong? Had being under other peoples’ thumbs his whole life made it so difficult for him to understand when something wasn’t his fault? His gaze slid over Kevin slowly, smile slipping as he observed him, taking up a glass of water and sipping at it, staring at the man across from him and shaking his head slightly.

“Tell me, Mr Day, what drove you to this conclusion?”

“I-”

“Never mind, I find myself uninterested in your odd logic. Moreau was nothing more than a game, for my late brother. He was a toy, a possession, and nothing you did, or did not do would have changed the treatment he received. As for Wesninski, we would have found him eventually. The boy knew so much anyway. He would have slipped up without his mother to teach him what to say. You played no part in their fates, and only a minimal amount in their pathetic lives. You just accelerated the process. We thank you for that, in fact.”

“If it is all the same to you, Lord Moriyama, I should still like to relieve them of their debts.”

“And what could you _possibly_ offer me that is worth more than the money I will receive from them?”

“Myself.”

“I will have someone come and take you to a room. I have a meeting and you are clearly not thinking straight. We shall discuss this… _foolishness_ in the morning,” he said, immediately closed off. Kevin thought he might have offended the man, but he was alive, and being given a room? So he can’t have been that offended. Could he?

 

The room he was given was unfairly luxurious for what he’d been expecting. Kevin all but sunk into the plush mattress as he settled down, sighing and tucking the small bag he’d brought with him under the bedside table. Going through the same motions he’d been watching a walkthrough of since Riko died, he got ready, before curling under the covers and closing his eyes.

Kevin’s dreams were a monochrome of orders and unhelpful discussion that only made him want to do more to prevent his plight. It was a twisted web of intertwining stories about Riko and Andrew and Neil and Jean. His first friends were his lost friends. His new friends… too wrapped in each other to see he was on a downwards spiral with no way to fix it. Trapped in a dystopia that he’d never imagined. Maybe it was because he’d seen a future when Riko had been alive. Once Andrew stopped paying attention to him, he’d still been able to see a light at the end of the tunnel. But now… Now Andrew had Neil, and Aaron and Nicky had even found themselves freed of their grip, and with Riko dead, it left Kevin floating in freedom that he didn’t know how to react to.

Dreams were fleeting. In his dreams, he could replay the good times. In his dreams, he was forced to relay the bad. In his dreams, as bad as he felt about it, Neil wasn’t there. Neil wasn’t there, and Andrew’s attention focused on him. He didn’t even like Andrew. And then they faded away and made room for the newcomer in his fucking dreams. Ichirou Moriyama. Kevin would never understand what possessed him to do this, but the demon wasn’t letting him go. In his dreams there were chains and collars and pain, but pleasure. Not that Kevin had ever had the chance to explore things properly. He just knew it intrigued him. Maybe offering this deal wouldn’t be the worst thing?

_Knock._

_Knock._

_Knock._

_“Mr Day? Are you in there?”_

He woke with a start, blearily blinking over at the door, frowning and sitting up with a low groan.

“I am.”

“I have brought you breakfast on Lord Moriyama’s orders, may I enter?”

Stumbling to the door groggily, Kevin pulled it open with a soft groan, allowing the man in with the tray, looking at the food on it as he realised how hungry he’d been.

“Lord Moriyama would like to see you in two hours. I will return to collect you then.”

Kevin nodded his affirmation and shut the door behind the man before settling on the bed, looking at the tray. At least it was healthy and not the rubbish Neil and Andrew would have him believe were ‘breakfast’ foods. Pancakes with syrup? Cereal that was more sugar than wheat? Terrible. Their habits were terrible. Kevin shook his head, and shook the thoughts of them away, picking up a croissant and tearing into it, checking. It was plain, this was good. No one needed chocolate chips in breakfast pastries. Ever.

He set down a cup and sighed, looking over the almost empty tray, and he picked up the glass of orange juice, staring into it for a moment before pulling his bag out from under the bedside table and rooting through it. He drank half of the orange juice before nodding, and he topped it up with vodka before it was tucked into his back again. He shrugged before drinking it as quickly as he could, shaking his head and clearing his throat as he set down the glass, making his way to the bathroom.

Showered, dressed and ready to face Ichirou Moriyama. Kevin blinked. Nope. That definitely didn’t sound right. In no way was he _ready_ to face Ichirou Moriyama. He never would be, thank you very much. He grabbed his vodka, taking a few more gulps of Dutch courage before tucking it into the depths of his bag again. And then he had to play the waiting game.

His least favourite game.

_Knock._

_Knock._

_Knock._

_“Lord Moriyama will see you now, if you’ll just follow me.”_

Kevin Day went to meet his doom.

 

“You are asking a very strange, very _weighted_ thing of me, Kevin.”

“I understand, Lord Moriyama.”

“And I will not release Wesninski and Moreau based on your disturbingly skewed logic. So tell me, Kevin Day. Why are you _really_ here? It cannot just be that.”

“I don’t know what you mean, Lord Moriyama. I told you why I’m here…”

“No. You offered _yourself._ Your very _freedom_ to me, for nothing but Nathaniel Wesninski and Jean Moreau’s Freedom. There is more going on here. There has to be.”

Kevin shifted in his seat uncomfortably, swallowing and running his hands through his hair. How could he ever explain why he thought his freedom in exchange for two people’s freedom was a fair deal? How could he ever explain the ever-painful sensations of his heart clenching when he heard the tell-tale “yes or no” or saw the 2 in the mirror even when it wasn’t there. How did he do that when he felt everything. Watching as he raised a hand to touch that tattoo and felt the ghost of Riko clenching a hand around his wrist, reliving the pain of a broken hand and a disgusted sneer. All in the moments before the 2 faded back into the queen that it was. He shuddered, fighting back a weak sob as he clenched his fists into his lap.

He knew Ichirou was watching, and he fought to retain his ever-slipping composure as the man analysed every movement and every thought he cycled through, he shuddered with a small whimper, shaking his head with a sigh.

Kevin was falling. The ground was opening up and there was nothing under it to catch him. Falling into nothing was far less fun when he had no clue where he’d land. At least before… there’d been Andrew. But now?

“This is a control issue, isn’t it?”

“What?”

“You, coming here,” Ichirou said. His tone was even, matter of fact. There was no judgement, there was nothing. It was just statements. “You have been under someone else’s thumb so long, and now that is slipping. You want to be controlled again. No, you need that. You _need_ someone to tell you what you want, what you need and how to get it. You require someone to call home, because a house is cold and empty and doesn’t work for you. There is no one behind the scenes.”

Kevin shuddered, staring at the man and sighing, closing his eyes and ducking his head, staring at his lap as he opened his eyes again.

“I… Yes, Lord Moriyama. I don’t know how to… not when there’s no one…”

He didn’t expect the man to stand, he didn’t expect the hand on his shoulder. He didn’t expect any of this, not when the Lord turned his chair around and put both hands on his shoulder, prompting Kevin to look up at him with a small frown.

“Lord Moriyama?”

“I will not force you into a new agreement. I do not believe you are thinking straight. For that reason, I am going to do something different. You will not be able to speak of this outside of this room for now.”

Kevin nodded, gazing at the man as he tried to work out just what was going on as he bit his lip, swallowing heavily and giving a small sigh.

“Stay another night while I prepare the paperwork. I am going to send you home for a week. If you come back after that week, there is no turning back, Kevin Day. Do you understand? If you come back, then your freedom will _replace_ your monetary debt. I will not free Wesninski and Moreau. I will give you this chance though, and we shall renegotiate after a period of time. But until then, you have to think long and hard about what I am asking of you.”

“Yes, my Lord.”

The smirk that spread over the Lord’s face made Kevin blink, and he patted the boy on the cheek carefully.

“You can call me that later. But for now, I am just Lord Moriyama. I am not _your_ Lord. Now. I would enjoy if you would join us for lunch, so I can explain the contract, and then I shall book your flight home. That is all.”

The dismissal was simple, and Kevin stood, bowing politely before leaving the room with as much composure as he could, asking a member of staff for directions back to his room. He had a lot to think about.

 

Lunch would turn out to be an awkward affair, with Kevin sitting in silence opposite Ichirou as the man watched him. He swallowed nervously, taking a short drink and looking around. Ichirou chuckled softly, fingers running over the text on the paperwork he was going over, eventually picking up a pen and filling in a few blanks.

He slid it over to Kevin.

“Read this, Kevin. Closely. Over the next week, you may fill it in. Do not sign a _thing_ until we meet then, if you show up. Understood? If you show up next week, we will consider it acceptance unless you object or have any pressing concerns. We will sign then.”

“Yes, Lord Moriyama.”

Kevin took the documents as they were slid over, eyes dancing over the words. He didn’t read it, he just tried to lift a few words from the page in an attempt to see what he needed to see? He didn’t want to read it and give away his reactions.

Kevin turned back to lunch, resting his hand on the papers for a moment before looking at Ichirou, nodding. Their eye contact only lasted a few moments, but it was long enough to allow Kevin to assess this situation and the proposal. He was nervous, that much he knew. But he was also a bit excited. He was _tired_ of feeling the way he did, and _tired_ of wishing things had gone differently. There were only so many ways someone could blame themselves for something going so wrong even when they took no direct action to warrant taking the blame.

Still, Kevin managed to bear the weight of the crushing volume on his chest. Still, he managed to drown every day, but always wake up the next. Exy kept him going, he supposed. In some ways, exy was the thing keeping him alive. But exy wouldn’t be there forever. Exy would force him to remember Riko, to remember Andrew, and Neil, and Jean, and everyone else that he’d spent time with that _knew_ without _knowing_ what it was he went through every time he reminisced on the time he spent being played with and taunted.

Still, Kevin failed to become what he needed.

“I have booked your flight. You leave tomorrow afternoon. Feel free to look around while you are here. I have no doubt you may like to use the gym today. I will have someone show you where it is.”

“Yes. Thank you, Lord Moriyama,” he said, tone soft as he stood up, awaiting the member of Ichirou’s staff that would show him around, the papers in hand.

They would lay under his clothing, safe until he returned home to read them, along with the ticket for his next flight.

But Kevin didn’t wait until the next day to read the contract.

He began reading that night, falling asleep with his fingers grazing the first lines of text.

 

_I, Kevin Day, request of Ichirou Moriyama the acceptance of my submission._

 

His mind was made up. But he would take the week Ichirou laid out for him. He knew the man wasn’t correct about his actions being rash. Kevin knew what he wanted, knew what he needed. Maybe this was it.


	2. Chapter 2

A week later found Kevin approaching the grand house, knocking on the door cautiously. He was met with a friendly face actually, one he’d seen a few times last time and offered him a kind, but knowing smile. He couldn’t help but return it, tilting his head and nodding as he was requested to follow, which he did without complaint, trailing after the man with a smile.

Looking around the room in recognition, Kevin couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. It was the one he’d been given last time, and he had to appreciate Ichirou’s consistency. He set his bag under the table and looked at the man, nodding gratefully.

“Lord Moriyama hopes you have a good night, your meeting is at ten tomorrow morning. Breakfast will be at eight, I’ll bring it to you.”

“Thank you, I appreciate it.”

The man bowed to Kevin and offered another fleeting smile before leaving him to settle in. He wondered for a moment just how much the Lord’s staff knew, but he doubted he’d tell them all of his business. It didn’t seem like Lord Moriyama’s style. Maybe there were a few more trusted members of the staff that were allowed more insight into his private life? But Kevin doubted that a little bit. He laughed softly, shaking his head at the thought and smiling faintly.

_Knock._

_Knock._

_Knock._

_“Mr Day, I have your breakfast.”_

“Thank you, please, set it on the table,” he said with a smile, far more prepared for the day than he had been last time he was here.

It was noticed, too. The man gave him a once over and nodded, commenting that he looked well rested, which was rewarded with a cheerful laugh, nodding.

“Thank you.”

When he left, Kevin made a note to ask his name next time, as he seemed to be helping him a lot. He’d like to talk to him properly one day. However, today was not that day. Kevin was too animated to think of such things. He dug the contract from his bag, reading t over as he ate toast and drunk orange juice that he -once again- spiked with vodka, helping him relax. He sighed softly, shaking his head and closing his eyes for a moment. This was it.

Kevin finished breakfast and went to brush his teeth, changing into a suit far more suitable for a meeting with Lord Moriyama. He swallowed back the uncomfortable lump in his throat, shaking his head at the sense of doom he could feel. It was wrong. What he was feeling. This wasn’t regret. It wasn’t even the end of the line.

This was the start. A new beginning that Kevin had desperately craved since he realised Andrew’s attention was slowly fading away from him.

This was the start.

Start.

It sounded so clean. So fresh. Could he even have begun to imagine a new start before now? His eyes drifted closer to his contract.

_Knock._

_Knock._

_Knock._

_“Lord Moriyama will see you now.”_

“I’m coming.”

Kevin Day stood up, grasped his contract, and bowed his head.

Kevin Day went to meet his next chapter.

 

Sat opposite the Lord, Kevin drummed his fingers absently on the table he was sat at, teeth working over his lips as he set the contract in front of the other. He blinked at him, surveying the man, trying to work out his feelings on this subject. He knew it was a big step and it put him in a very different position, one he’d need to hide wherever possible because it just didn’t work with his exy career.

That was okay though, right?

He didn’t have to sacrifice his emotions for his career, did he? Just like he didn’t have to sacrifice his career to feel.

It would change the dynamic, but it would not change who he was. He was still Kevin Day, starting striker of the Palmetto Foxes, Son of Exy, Future Court. He could still make court if he did this. He could still do something great. He could succeed and give up the part of himself that was holding him back.

Ironic that his freedom would be gained through signing it away...

“Do you have any concerns, queries, objections about the contract and what will be expected of you?”

“None, Lord Moriyama.”

“Are there any parts that you would like to change?”

“No, Lord Moriyama.”

“And you understand that this contract is not legally binding, you may cancel it at any time and we will discuss the terms of your debt, but unless you choose to do that, you will be mine for the next 3 months, at which point we can discuss a new agreement, or renew the contract? You may also request a renegotiation at any point in time.”

“I understand, Lord Moriyama.”

“If I feel your feelings are changing and you are withdrawing from me, I shall sit and talk with you, it is possible that – if you choose not to communicate – I may decide to withdraw the contract.”

“Yes, Lord Moriyama.”

“Then I have no more to tell you, and if you are willing, we can sign the contract.”

“I would like that, Lord Moriyama.”

Kevin watched as Ichirou picked up a pen, a looping signature gliding onto the page before he handed it over to Kevin. In contrast, his own signature was a scratchy thing, still not quite used to writing with either of his hands since the break. But it was okay. He looked at the Lord and then dropped his gaze politely, swallowing.

Everything felt heavy… but in that weight there was a sense of hope, something brighter, something bolder. It was a feeling of pure, unadulterated joy. Kevin couldn’t wait to see what would happen next.

 

Kevin’s head was resting on the man’s knee as he knelt on a pillow the Lord laid out for him. The Lord… No… _His_ Lord. He could call him that now. His eyes drifted closed for a moment as he felt his hand in his hair, tugging lightly at the strands as they thread between his fingers. It was such a small gesture, a careful one, as if his Lord was testing the waters, beginning to play with the discussions they’d had. And yet it was such a small gesture that Kevin couldn’t fathom how to react.

His breathing was deep, even, almost as if he was falling asleep. That didn’t mean, however, that he didn’t notice the way Ichirou’s gaze moved to him, prompting him to look up at the man in a silent question.

“Are you well down there?”

“Yes, My Lord.”

Kevin smiled slightly, gazing up at Ichirou for a moment as he watched the man. He found himself surprised when nothing had happened after signing the contract. He found himself curious about the fact that he’d been told to kneel, but he had not been told to do anything for Ichirou. Kevin had been convinced they would start right away.

They didn’t.

Kevin didn’t mind this though. It was a rather nice opening to an agreement that would develop from here. Kevin would happily follow Ichirou’s instructions, it wasn’t like Riko hadn’t used him for things like that. Not… personally, of course – something about getting tainted – but he’d liked to watch. Actually, Kevin made a note to not bring that up. He had a feeling any mention of Riko was a bad idea. He could work through that on his own if he needed to. It wasn’t like it’d be the first time.

“Kevin.”

“Yes, My Lord?”

“I can almost feel you thinking, and I remain unconvinced that it is not something bothering you.”

“I was just thinking about how different this is… It’s not what I was expecting. It’s kind of nice.”

“Behave then, and it will stay that way.”

It might’ve been a threat, but Kevin saw a small quirk pull up the corner of his lips as he turned his gaze back to the paperwork he was doing.

This would become a beautiful partnership. Kevin knew, he knew that he would never go back to what he had before… Not without a lot of effort on his part. This was just beginning, and already it felt right. It was leaving Kevin calm, ready to tackle the new situation without fear, without worrying about judgement or cruelty. It left Kevin feeling like he wasn’t just pretending.

He wasn’t just going through the motions of pretending everything was okay. Even though this was so new, he already realised that giving himself somewhere to focus his energy was going to benefit him. He’d have a goal, to make Ichirou happy. He wouldn’t have to play games with Andrew if he did something wrong. He wouldn’t have to jump through hoops for Riko’s hard to earn forgiveness. And better still… There was no rush to “get over it” from people that couldn’t understand his love for the boy that put him through so much shit.

He’d never understand that bit.

He’d never understand how to deal with the loss of Riko. Because Riko had still been alive when Kevin escaped him… He was still, as much as Kevin hated to think it, an option.

An option Kevin had been well prepared to accept.

 

The hand gave a light tug as it ran through his hair, prompting Kevin to turn to the man sitting beside him. He smiled faintly as he watched him, waiting for him to give him an order. He nuzzled his thigh gently, not paying too much attention to what he was doing. He was just calmly accepting the situation he’d found himself in. He met Ichirou’s gaze for a moment, and he saw a fleeting smirk cross the man’s lips.

“Is everything alright, Kevin?”

Kevin wasn’t exactly well versed in what he knew would be expected of him. He’d had a bit of… experience with the girls of Riko’s choosing, and a bit more with the boys that Riko let borrow his toys. But outside of that, he hadn’t been told how to do things, or how to make the experiences more enjoyable for him.

“I’m not sure what I can do for you, My Lord…”

Ichirou looked him over, pursing his lips before removing the hand from his head and sighing. Kevin wondered if he’d upset him, but then the Lord was just observing him for a moment. Kevin stayed as still as possible, looking over the man’s shoulder to avoid his gaze.

“Stand.”

Kevin did, almost jumping to obey in a small rush, biting his lip as he gazed at the man in front of him. He looked towards the floor, fingers picking at the sleeves of his jacket. He could feel Ichirou’s gaze on him, but Kevin remained quiet, chewing absently on his lip as he tried to work out what the Lord was considering. But it was a dangerous game he was playing. Trying to get a look into the Lord’s mind was rarely an endeavour that ended in something good.

Kevin didn’t want to play with fire, so he stopped playing guessing games with himself and instead continued gnawing on his lip.

“Now tell me, Kevin, what are you thinking about?”

“I want to please you, My Lord. But I don’t know where to begin… It’s been a while since I’ve…”

“Since you have what?”

“Pleasured anyone. Not since Riko had me and Jean do it whenever he wanted. For other ravens. Not himself, usually.”

“I see.”

“Does that disappoint you?”

“Only that you failed to mention it before. It seems like an important detail, Kevin.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

 

Kevin found himself in Ichirou’s room a bit later once the man’s meetings had finished. He was sitting at a desk, sulking a bit as he wrote lines left handed on Ichirou’s command. The letters were taking a while to form at this point, but he couldn’t complain he supposed. He was just glad that Ichirou had decided this was good enough. Two sides of paper with ‘I must not keep secrets from my Lord’ scrawled awkwardly onto them as many times as he could fit.

Obeying without complaint, Kevin took the punishment as graciously as he could, though he wasn’t happy about it. He hadn’t _enjoyed_ writing since he broke his hand. Learning to write right handed had been a challenge, and it was even harder re-learning to write left handed. It took a while, but eventually, he had the pages done. He set down the pen and looked at the pages. Admittedly, he was a bit disheartened that they looked so messy, but nonetheless, he spoke up.

“My Lord? I’m finished.”

Ichirou crossed the room to where Kevin was sat, and he took the page, checking the work before nodding. Kevin glanced at him for a moment before dropping his gaze, pausing when he felt the man’s hand in his hair.

“My Lord?”

“Come, Kevin, this way.”

Kevin rose from his seat and followed the lord without any question or concern, placing his trust in the man he’d handed his freedom over to.


	3. Chapter 3

Soft moans corrupted the air, sweet sounding and as quiet as the man making them could be in the situation he found himself in. He’d given the other a bit more control than he might’ve liked, but neither was disappointed. Kevin gave a soft little hum which only provoked more groans and a slight buck of the other’s hips as he felt the fingers carding through his hair, eyes angled towards the other’s face.

His Lord’s face.

He could see the hints of bliss on what he could spot of Ichirou’s face. It might’ve been an odd reaction to have, but just knowing _he_ was doing this to the usually so composed Lord was very appealing. Why wouldn’t it be?

Kevin’s hands were behind his back, hands clasped together as the man used his hair to keep him in position. He wasn’t pulling, something Kevin was rather grateful for since, as he’d told Ichirou, it had been a while. Admittedly, Kevin didn’t mind this sort of attention, because just knowing that it was him causing the reactions, knowing it was _him_ impressing his Lord, made it all feel better.

Gentle licks and kisses were pressed over the surface of his cock as Kevin paid particular attention to the way Ichirou reacted, until he found that gently sucking on the head was getting the best reactions. Kevin knew, however, he couldn’t just do one thing on repeat.

Trial and error was his best bet, but he wasn’t actually paying too much attention to what he was doing, lost in the fact that he was doing it. His tongue pressing against any spot that was making Ichirou moan like that. He shuddered a little when the man above him gave a short tug of his hair, and he peered up at him, humming softly in an unasked question as if he didn’t know what humming or moaning around his cock was doing to him.

“Use your hands.”

It was an order, but the way it was spoken is what caught Kevin’s attention. Throaty, forced, rough. All these things that were rarely associated with Ichirou Moriyama. Refined, calm, prepared Ichirou Moriyama. Kevin was making him lose his good form, and nothing could make him happier in this moment.

It felt like a success.

It felt like he was regaining something he’d lost of himself.

But to do it, he’d given himself away.

He began to stroke Ichirou’s cock where he couldn’t get it in his mouth, using the other to massage his balls carefully. He tried to find a way that would feel good for his Lord, even though it had been a while. He succeeded, apparently, because it didn’t take long for sharp breaths to become pants and for Ichirou’s grip to tighten in his hair.

“Kevin I am going to…”

He didn’t finish.

Well he did, but not in the way he’d been trying to.

The warning wasn’t exactly well timed, considering he was cumming in Kevin’s mouth at the moment he started trying to tell him, which meant the brunette had no choice but to swallow as much as he could, grimacing at the feeling as some of the liquid escaped his mouth when he pulled off of Ichirou’s cock.

He grimaced a bit, raising his hand to wipe it off, but that only resulted in Ichirou’s fingers closing around his wrist.

Kevin looked up at him, blinking in a curious confusion. What? Ichirou smirked at him, swiping his thumb through his seed and smearing it over Kevin’s lips.

“Leave it. I think I like you like this.”

The flush that coated Kevin’s cheeks was embarrassed and a little bit frustrated as he looked at Ichirou. He liked _what?_ Kevin couldn’t say he was amused by that declaration, but he knelt in place, watching the man in front of him curiously for what he’d do next.

 

“Stand up and bend over the desk, Kevin.”

Kevin did as he was told, still a bit disgruntled by Ichirou declining him to wipe his face. Although he knew it could be worse. He jumped when he felt lips on the back of his neck, just below his hair, and the soft rush of air against his skin informed him that Ichirou felt it too. Kevin could _easily_ say that he wasn’t expecting the tenderness that was coming with Ichirou, It wasn’t anything he could’ve told someone the Lord would be like.

His Lord’s fingers traced over the jacket he wore, following the slight curve of his spine before resting just at the small of his back.

“Strip. I want to look at you properly.”

“Yes, My Lord.”

Kevin stood up, shedding the layers of clothing he wore and laying them over the back of the chair, not wanting to waste time with folding them but also not keen on the idea of leaving them wherever.

He went to go and bend back over the desk, but a hand around his arm stopped him, and he looked at Ichirou, blinking before turning his gaze to the floor.

“Stand in the centre of the room. Legs a shoulder width apart, hands behind your head.”

Oh. When Ichirou said he wanted to look at him, he’d meant in detail. Okay. Kevin flushed at the thought, following the order without a single complaint, because he wasn’t unhappy that his Lord was changing it up a bit from the past few days. They’d been slow, and Kevin had been getting restless. He didn’t watch Ichirou as he approached, listening to him instead. He’d not been told he could move, and Kevin was good at playing obedient. Or rather, he’d learnt the hard way in the past.

Hands laid on the back of his shoulders, tracing between his shoulder blades and over his back slowly as he shuddered a bit. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to this. It didn’t feel _right._ He was meant to be serving Ichirou. And here he was standing, the man’s hands gliding over his skin. Exploring with gentle touches, Kevin found himself lost in the feeling of something he could get used to. Something he shouldn’t get used to.

But he wanted to.

Even though getting used to anything had only ever ended in him being left in pain or alone. He wanted to be able to enjoy something, to not have to worry about what would come next.

 

He shuddered, feeling the man’s fingers tracing over his muscles, but otherwise, didn’t move at all, not having permission. He didn’t move when Ichirou’s fingers traced over his spine, or even when he felt him walking around him in a slow observant circle. His eyes were closed and he was listening, trying to observe without observing everything. Until it got too quiet. Ichirou wasn’t moving. He also wasn’t touching him or talking. Kevin opened his eyes, finding himself looking directly into the man’s eyes as he startled.

He was smirking at him, and that in itself confused Kevin. It was almost a mirthful expression that – if Kevin was inclined to notice – rather suited the Lord. If he saw that again, he didn’t think he’d mind.

“Enjoying yourself, Mr Day?”

“I was under the impression that was you, My Lord,” he said softly, watching him as he walked around again.

If that was a bit of cheek he was giving his Lord, then he’d accept that he deserved the slap to his rear that came following the words. It provoked a soft squeak from Kevin that made Ichirou arch a brow in surprise.

“Really?”

“What?”

“You can get checked into walls, and thrown over and hit in the face, but being spanked makes you squeak like a little mouse?”

“I… wasn’t expecting it?”

“Sure.”

Kevin huffed softly, shaking his head. He almost wanted to pout. He decided against it, however. That’d be like letting him win, so he avoided it, biting his lip.

A soft whine escaped the back of his throat. Head tipping back, he shuddered when one of his hands travelled up his neck.He swallowed heavily. Kevin wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but he could _assure_ everyone that the tenderness he was being shown was not that.

His Lord was far more cautious about this agreement than Kevin had ever been expecting, but he wasn’t too put off by that. After treading on eggshells around Andrew and flinching every time Riko moved too quickly, being _contracted_ to his Lord was like a blessing in disguise. It had felt like a trap perhaps. But despite giving him what he wanted, Ichirou was careful. Careful enough to take into account what Kevin had told him, and perceptive enough to work out what Kevin was after (even if he was meant to tell him that himself). He could prompt him with questions, and Kevin would answer, but it was still hard to keep up with.

 

Cold fingers traced his spine, making Kevin shiver as he arched away from it. He knew what Ichirou was doing, trying to psych him up for the main event. His touches were strategic, the way he probed for Kevin’s sensitive spots, pulling out soft moans from him and cataloguing those areas for later, he was sure.

In any case, he couldn’t help but squeak in soft surprise as those long fingers probed down until they were between his buttocks, probing at his entrance. He couldn’t suppress the soft whimper when they withdrew and came back coated in a cold liquid he could only identify as lube by the situation he was in.

Ichirou’s breath fanned over the back of his neck as he chuckled. Kevin shivered, whining quietly about the liquid being cold, only resulting in a slight slap to his rear as his Lord kissed his shoulder in a contradictory action.

When his fingers pressed into him, Kevin made a soft sound, pressing back against him and closing his eyes as he took a sharp breath without meaning to. He wasn’t sure how this was different to anything else he’d done in the past back in the nest, but it felt different.

“Relax, Kevin. Are you doing well?”

“Yes, My Lord, I’m fine.”

“Can you give me a colour? Stoplight system, if you are familiar with it?”

“Green. It’s good, My Lord. I was just caught off guard.”

“Understandable.”

He nodded and leant back against Ichirou a bit, stabilising himself against him and taking a few breaths until he was able to relax against him. He closed his eyes then, letting himself get lost in the feelings. He felt the first finger, probing past the ring of muscle and after a short while, a soft moan escaped him, and he felt the curl of Ichirou’s lips as he smirked against his shoulder while he worked his fingers into him, fingering him slowly, deeply.

It had to be on purpose… Kevin didn’t think he could pull sounds like this out of him without trying. He whined softly, bucking his hips a bit only for a strong hand to grasp his hip in response, holding him still as Kevin squirmed.

He felt the second finger being added, but at this point, Ichirou had wound the hand previously on his hip around his cock, stroking him slowly and smirking a little as he listened to him respond. If there was any discomfort, Kevin was oblivious to it, busy focusing on holding his control as best he could, moaning as he tried to hold back. He shuddered at the feelings and moaned throatily, pressing back against the man. He felt his fingers twisting and probing inside him and he groaned, tipping his head back and mewling helplessly as his hand worked over his cock. Oh god…

“Are you okay there, Kevin?” Ichirou enquired, sounding quite pleasant.

It almost made Kevin want to snap at him. He knew damn well what he was doing to him! He wouldn’t snap, of course, knowing he’d reap the consequences.

“I’m… I want to cum, My Lord.”

“Not yet.”

He’d been expecting that, but it was still frustrating as all hell.

 

He wasn’t even sure how long he’d been here, reduced to a moaning mess whose legs were ready to give out at any second. Kevin had asked (and thankfully received) permission from Ichirou to move, and that was how they found themselves on the bed. It was a far more comfortable position they were in, Kevin on his hands and knees as his Lord knelt behind him, fingering him as though it was the last thing he’d ever do.

Still not allowing him permission to cum.

Kevin was beginning to think it was a small test on how well he dealt with orders. Of course he was good at taking orders. Between Riko and Andrew, it’s all he’d ever done, and based on the fact that he travelled to meet Ichirou for this, one could conclude that it was all he ever _wanted_ to do. Who knew? At this point, Kevin definitely didn’t. But this was the closest to himself he’d ever felt.

It happened without warning, without so much of a whimpered ‘My Lord’ as he tried valiantly to push back his urges. It didn’t happen. A choked whimper escaped as he painted the sheets white and panted heavily. It felt like it was all coming rapid fire on his hypersensitivity.

Ichirou smirked, pressing a kiss to his shoulder as he withdrew from Kevin, walking away to fetch a bottle of water to give it to him once Kevin sat up.

“Drink. Relax.”

“What about you, my Lord?”

“Today was not about me.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

Kevin walked into the dorms riding on a high after his recent visit with Ichirou. He sighed softly as he entered the room, only to be accosted by Andrew. Not like that mattered. He met his gaze evenly, a tiny bit bolder than he would’ve been any other day. He blinked and simply walked around him.

“Where have you been?”

Kevin just blinked, turning back to him from the glass of juice he’d just poured himself. It was an annoying question, honestly. Andrew didn’t care where he went. Apparently, he only had a problem when he wasn’t wrapped up in Neil. Kevin’s gaze filtered around the room. Ah. There he was, sitting on the bed watching the scene unfold with his usual unamused look. Kevin rolled his eyes, sipping at his drink.

“You’re not my keeper, Andrew,” he said quietly, watching as the other’s eyes narrowed.

“You disappear multiple times in the last month and that’s all you can say, Day?”

Kevin shrugged, not giving an answer because Andrew didn’t need one. This was Kevin’s business, Ichirou’s business. Not to mention it wouldn’t be the first time he’d kept secrets from someone that thought they owned him.

He shrugged, walking past Andrew to sit with Neil, striking up a conversation about the next season. Andrew rolled his eyes and scoffed at them, probably muttering something scathing (and in Neil’s case, fond) about junkies. They discussed their season up until Andrew looked at Neil, asked him their ever-strange ritual, and then they left. Kevin didn’t mind. It meant he was alone. He pulled out his phone, scrolling through messages and hovering over one particular name. He had to message him anyway, putting it off would only get him in trouble, so he opened a text conversation.

 

_[From: Kevin]_

_17:08_

_Made it home safe. Andrew already on my case. When can I visit again?_

_[From: Ichirou]_

_17:13_

_I am glad to hear you returned to palmetto safely, Kevin. Unfortunately, I cannot drag you away too often if you are uncomfortable with them all finding out. I will visit during your next away game if you think you can escape Minyard’s iron grip._

_[From: Kevin]_

_17:15_

_Yes. My Lord. I can. Promise._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_17:17_

_Do not make promises you are unable to keep. We all know what Minyard is like. Go. Eat something, do some reading, and get an early night. It has been a long few weeks for you._

_[From: Kevin]_

_17:20_

_Yes, My Lord._

Kevin’s thumb brushed over the texts as the chain went silent, and he sighed softly, locking his phone and sliding it into his pocket before going to do as he was told. He found some food in the freezer, throwing something together before plating it up. He paused, looking at the leftovers. Then he placed them on a plate and covered it with foil, resolving to mention it to Neil whenever he and Andrew got back. He sat at the table, drumming his fingers on the wood as he ate, shaking his head and sighing a bit.

He was bored. It’d been such an interesting time with Ichirou, and now it was over until they could see each other again. Kevin never thought he’d miss him like that so easily.

He decided to work on a few assignments. It got his mind off Ichirou the easiest because it only involved history. Exy revolved around Ichirou, so that’d be a fun revelation to have the next morning.

 

_[From: Ichirou]_

_05:33_

_I assume you will be waking soon, for your morning practice. You told me it was at six, correct? In which case, have fun. Eat a proper breakfast and put aside one hour for study today._

_[From: Kevin]_

_05:47_

_Yes, My Lord. Thank you._

It was a nice gesture to wake up to, one that put Kevin in an oddly good mood that morning. He could tell they were watching him, as if waiting for him to explode or something. But the facts were, he was too happy to care. Although he did snap at them a few times to get them to pay attention. He was in a good mood, not a slacker.

 

Practice, paired with the morning text left him riding on a damn high. He sighed softly, closing his eyes as he showered. His hands ran through his hair and he let the water wash over him, pushing away any concerns he may have had. Kevin shook his head, wrapping a towel around his waist when he stepped out of the shower, wandering to his locker when he heard them.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes… Andrew.”

Kevin scowled at the lockers and grabbed his clothes, shaking his head. Fuck sake. He got dressed quickly, before realising that was his lift home, and he all but slammed his locker shut when he heard Neil whisper out another breathless yes.

“Oh for fuck sake,” he muttered, scowling and striding out of the lockers, phone in hand. He leant on the Maserati, staring at his phone and sighing.

 

_[From: Kevin]_

_08:56_

_Can I get a car, My Lord?_

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:02_

_A car? Why? I thought Minyard travelled with you._

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:04_

_Except they’ve been making out in the lockers for 5 minutes. Quite frankly, embarrassing._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:07_

_Jealous?_

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:08_

_NO! Don’t expect this from you my Lord, honestly._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:10_

_My apologies. As for the car. Perhaps. Can you even drive?_

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:13_

_Haven’t needed to for a long time. Might need lessons, My Lord._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:15_

_Perhaps then. Shame you are not here. I have a meeting in 15 minutes. You could have made it more tolerable._

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:17_

_What would you have had me do, My Lord?_

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:23_

_I shall tell you when you visit._

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:25_

_Yes, My Lord._

Kevin flushed slightly as he looked at the messages, shoving his phone in his pocket just in time to look up as Neil and Andrew finally finished whatever they’d been doing. He scowled slightly at them and waited for the car to be unlocked so he could slide into it, glad to be able to escape them once they got in. He sighed slightly, shaking his head.

It wasn’t too bad. He went to class and did the hour of studying he’d been told to do, running a hand through his hair in frustration when he got a bit stuck on one of the questions. That only made him sigh in frustration when he found it in the paragraph of his textbook he hadn’t read.

It was hard to concentrate on his studies, and in the end, he put his phone in a drawer so that he’d stop getting distracted by the thought that Ichirou could text at any minute. He somehow, after studying, ended up sitting with Nicky. It wasn’t a common occurrence. They got along well enough, but Kevin was more reserved than the other, and it could cause some tension. He was also more focused, which caused even more tension on the court.

“You’ve been distracted.”

“So have you.”

Kevin wasn’t sure why he felt so defensive over a situation that wasn’t even an accusation. It was a simple observation that had been mentioned in passing as they discussed. Of course, he knew where it was coming from. His fear that he’d be fund out after all Andrew did for him. But then, surely if anyone would understand fighting to be happy, it would be Nicky wouldn’t it?

Not that the revelation made it any easier. Or made Kevin any more willing to talk.

Nicky didn’t push, something Kevin was more grateful for than he cared to admit. Instead, he’d offered him a smile just before slipping away to play video games with Aaron.

Kevin returned to studying for a short while.

 

_[From: Ichirou]_

_15:43_

_You have another practise soon if I am correct. Do well, Kevin._

_[From: Kevin]_

_15:54_

_I’ll try, My Lord._

Kevin smiled a bit as he shut his phone in his locker, fixing up his kit and grabbing his racquet. He didn’t notice the arch of Nicky’s brow – or the fact that he’d been watching him at all. He simply strode onto the court ready to yell at the team to do well. It was almost time for their first game of the season and honestly, at this rate they’d be right back where they started and Kevin was not having it. He didn’t escape to the foxes, befriend Neil, and mourn Riko just to end up back where they damn started!

Maybe it was the realisation that the team wasn’t up to scratch, but something was grating on Kevin by the time practise was over. He was fuming. So many of the team, the new Foxes were annoying and bordering on unbearable. He was just glad that he had at least Neil on his side, most of the time. Admittedly, he noticed Nicky putting in more effort even, and he flashed him a supportive smile, owing his efforts to their conversation.

 

A conversation that was picked up a bit later as he sat next to Nicky later on. He noticed him looking, and Kevin gave a small shrug.

“It’s a person isn’t it? Distracting you, I mean.”

Kevin blanched and looked at him, trying to survey the situation. If Nicky told Andrew about this he’d never hear the end of it. He looked around and frowned, attempting to avoid the inevitability that someone would hear the conversation.

“I can tell you’re not ready to talk. I felt the same when I went to Germany the first time. I’ll listen if you need someone… I know it’s hard, Kevin. You don’t have to do this all alone. If you need to talk, I just… yeah. I won’t tell anyone anyway. That’s your choice. Always.”

He’d never appreciated Nicky more than he did in that moment.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

Kevin fiddled with his phone a bit, shrugging absently. This wasn’t the same as keeping a secret about Riko and what he’d done.

 

_[From: Kevin]_

_23:42_

_Can’t sleep. Overthinking._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_23:46_

_What is wrong, Kevin? Are you worried about your game? You know you will do well._

_[From: Kevin]_

_23:50_

_No I… I think I just need to talk? But I don’t wanna tell Andrew about all of this after all he did for me? Nicky offered. But It’s… I’m just not sure._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_23:53_

_If you think talking to your friends will help, there is no clause preventing you. A support system is important. I am certain your friend will understand your request for privacy._

_[From: Kevin]_

_23:57_

_Yeah… I think I’m gonna find him… I need to get it off my chest I think. I’ll go to bed after._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_00:03_

_Make up for the late night tomorrow._

_[From: Kevin]_

_00:05_

_Yes, My Lord._

Kevin tapped Nicky on the shoulder when he found him, biting his lip a little bit as he watched him. Once Nicky’s attention was on him, he gestured to the door. Nicky nodded, and they left, walking out until they found a bench that Kevin found a suitable way away from the dorms.

Nicky looked at him and Kevin wanted to hide again, away from the soft gaze being cast his way. He hated it. Kevin was always stronger than this. It felt like Nicky was gazing into his soul, scanning the newfound vulnerabilities he’d discovered. He knew it was an impossibility. He knew Nicky didn’t have telepathic skills or something stupid like that.

“It’s a person?”

He nodded.

“Do I know them?”

“You know… _of_ him?”

Nicky nodded, not commenting on the pronoun as he reached over to pat Kevin’s shoulder, lightly stroking as he sighed. Usually, Kevin might have shrugged him off or yelled at him. But at this moment the physical comfort what all he wanted. It felt strange without it, even if he’d only recently let physical touch become something other than a display of nightmares.

“What’s worrying you? It’s not Andrew or Neil is it?”

A near hysterical laugh bubbled up from his throat as he shook his head, falling further into the touch. The suggestion sounded crazy, but it was still less insane than reality, wasn’t it? He slumped against Nicky, balling his fists into the other’s shirt and he clutched him. It was hard to say, but harder to stop the words forming.

“Ichirou Moriyama.”

Nicky’s hands stilled from where they were working over Kevin’s back. Silence. He should’ve known. Why would Nicky understand about this? Long distance, sure, but not ‘oh yes I have a thing for the mafia boss that threatened us all.’ He probably sounded crazy. Kevin withdrew from the other and scooted over to the opposite side of the bench. It took everything he had not to curl into himself as he braced for the worst. He prepared for anger. For violence. For disgust. Realisation hit him a bit late that those things weren’t exactly in Nicky’s track record. In fact, the man in question was just staring at him ponderously. Not judgemental, just curious.

“Who knows?”

“You.”

“And you would like to keep it a secret?”

“Yes.”

“Well. I can’t say I’m a fan of the idea on principle, but I won’t tell…”

He could tell he wanted to say more, and he mentioned as much. Nicky shifted a bit uncomfortably, as if trying to find the words to broach the subject. For someone all but renowned for insensitivity, he was doing a good job now.

“He’s not… you know. Threatening you or anything if you don’t, is he? Or… pushing you further than you’d like or somethi-”

“No!” Kevin denied quickly, interrupting Nicky to make his point. “He’s not… I mean… It was kinda my idea…”

“Oh?”

“Well, I mean, I’d done that _stuff_ with the ravens… Not often, but enough… And Andrew has Neil now and…”

“You felt pushed away… lonely… abandoned…”

“Yeah…”

Nicky nodded and looked around before returning his attention to Kevin with a small smile. He knew what he meant. He knew what it all meant. For Nicky, pushed away, lonely and abandoned were a way of life. In fact it was a life that he’d chosen all to keep the twins away from his parents, and wasn’t that just a kick in the gut. Kevin sighed faintly, closing his eyes and shaking his head. He knew this wasn’t perfect. He just… It was a lot to deal with.

“I won’t tell Andrew.”

“Thank you…”

“How do you feel about your situation?”

“I don’t know? It’s weird… He technically owns me… But it doesn’t feel that way. He’s a caretaker almost…”

The laugh that disturbed the quiet had a small smirk turning up the corner of Kevin’s lips as he watched his teammate.

“Kinda adorable.”

They spoke a little bit more, Kevin explaining some of the contract as Nicky listened, occasionally asking questions. It was reassuring, knowing he now had a confidant. He didn’t know why he’d been so terrified, but then… It _was_ only Nicky that found out. He knew it’d be worse if… _when_ Andrew found out.

 

_[From: Kevin]_

_05:34_

_Just woke up. Practice in a bit. Morning, My Lord._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_05:37_

_Send a picture after your shower? I think that could be nice._

Kevin flushed as he read the message, but he followed the instruction. Once he’d showered after practise, he lingered. He wasn’t actually sure what pictures he’d want. Once everyone was out of the lockers, he paused. He collected his phone, taking a pair of photos. One of his face, far more tasteful than the second, which began just under his queen tattoo, travelling down his chest, still damp from the shower.

He blushed as he hit send, quickly deleting the evidence on his end and finishing getting dressed for the day, kit getting haphazardly shoved in his locker.

 

_[From: Ichirou]_

_09:14_

_Thank you._

_[From: Kevin]_

_09:17_

_You’re welcome, My Lord._

He felt like he was going to blush forever from now on or something. Ridiculous. Fortunately, it had faded by the time he was faced with Andrew. Thank the lord. Not his lord. Not this time. Well. At least Ichirou seemed to like them?

 

_[From: Ichirou]_

_10:43_

_Did you speak to your friend?_

_[From: Kevin]_

_10:46_

_Yes, My Lord._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_Good. I hope that went okay._

Kevin smiled. It was nice, the concern he showed him. It encouraged his view that this was the right thing. Even without threats hanging over his head, Ichirou was paying him attention. He could appreciate that. He was happy about Ichirou’s attention. He was happy about the way things were going.

It felt like his life was finally turning around. The past was finally making way for a positive.


	5. Chapter 5

_Wear this during your next game._

The cryptic note was enough to make Kevin curious. It gave no hint to what would be inside the box, but it made him arch a brow as he bit his lip, gazing at the box. He looked around, even though he knew the room was empty, he wouldn’t have even got the box out if he hadn’t been alone. Kevin swallowed in anticipation, trying to fix the fact that is mouth felt dry, as though he hadn’t had a drink in a long time.

He sat with the box in his lap for the longest time, alternating between gnawing on his lip and reading the note, fingers tracing over the taped edge. Steeling himself for whatever the Lord had planned, he slowly tore at the tape, dipping his hand into a tissue paper filled void until his hands grazed a box. Another one? He withdrew it, thankful that this one was held closed only by ribbons, not more tape, and he untied it, the orange and white falling around him. He’d keep that. He’d use it on Neil’s Christmas gift later this year. Perhaps he could tell him to pass it on. It could be a funny, odd tradition of pass on the ribbon.

That wasn’t the point here though, and he berated himself for allowing himself to get distracted when he was so close to finding out what he had been told to wear at the end of this week for their away game. He was honestly expecting something awful and embarrassing, just based on the lacking content of the note. But that proved to be less of the case as he lifted the lid of the box.

He didn’t move for the better half of a minute, staring at the contents of the gift with a furrowed brow and a hint of confusion on his face. Tossing the lid aside, he slid a hand into the box and withdrew the first item. Lace. Black. _Panties._ Kevin just stared at them for a moment, cheeks lighting up in a rose glow that he wouldn’t be able to explain away right now. He stared at the gift and rifled through the remaining items in the box, clearing his throat. Black, red, white, blue, more red, and others… The first thing he noticed was the red and black though, conditioned to respond to raven colours even now. It made him narrow his eyes ever so slightly, but he found the other note quickly, and looked it over.

_I’m sure you noticed the raven colours, but that wasn’t an attack to you. I just couldn’t bare to buy you orange panties, so I went with red. They’ll look better._

He couldn’t really argue with that. The fox colours were… garish, to say the least. He was just surprised Ichirou thought of him at all. Not to mention, he’d just never really thought of him as being someone that would want to see him in panties? Then again, there was a lot he didn’t know about his Lord, he supposed.

 

Nicky looked at him from over the locker room and Kevin gave a half-hearted nod that was thankfully missed by the other foxes. He waited until they’d filtered out and approached him, sitting on the bench under the guise of removing his shoes. Nicky sat by him with a grin.

“What was in the box?”

“Panties.”

“Wait! You mean like-? He sent you!”

“Yes. Lord Ichirou Moriyama sent me panties…”

Nicky laughed and nudged him, shaking his head in amusement. If Kevin wasn’t fond of his confidant, (or his life when Andrew found out,) he’d whack him with the shoe he’d taken off. As it was, he just shook his head.

“He wants me to wear them to our next game. I don’t know how I’ll swing that. It’s an away game.”

“Go in and get changed before, say you’ll do press duty. I’ll go on with you?”

Kevin looked at Nicky for a moment, then nodded, brow furrowing a bit as he considered the possibility.

“Yes. That sounds good, you can make sure they don’t see, that’s good,” he confirmed, watching Nicky and offering a smile.

He hadn’t realised how much he appreciated Nicky until this happened. He’d always worried about a secret getting out, especially when it was discovered by one of the gossip queens. But Nicky had proved a powerful ally, and one that Kevin would definitely be relieved to have on his side for this. Because it would come to a head, he was certain of it.

“If this gets out, I’m gonna be in for a wild ride…”

“I’ll join you on it, don’t you worry.”

“You’ll join me in hell, Hemmick.”

“I’ll be ruling it.”

Kevin smirked and shook his head, giving his friend a shove, and then they finally walked out of the locker to a bored looking Andrew. They were lucky he waited, actually. Kevin was half convinced he’d leave at the first opportunity. But apparently, he was feeling kind, or perhaps he was just feeling less apathetic towards them than usual. Neil was good for him, evidently. Kevin would never tell him that though, at the risk of getting stabbed brutally. He didn’t think Andrew would stab him, but he also knew him _just_ well enough to not want to test that.

 

_[From: Ichirou]_

_19:57_

_Did you get my gift, Kevin?_

_[From: Kevin]_

_20:00_

_Yes, My Lord. Sending an unmarked box with a vague note to my dorm was such a clever move._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_20:04_

_Are you sassing me through text?_

_[From: Kevin]_

_20:06_

_I don’t know what you mean. I would never do such a thing, My Lord._

_[From: Ichirou]_

_20:07_

_You are! You are sassing me through text. I will let it drop this time, because, in a way, you are right. I hope I will not be disappointed when we meet. I will see you then._

_[From: Kevin]_

_20:09_

_See you then, My Lord. Get a good night sleep._

 

Game day came quickly, and Kevin changed in record time, terrified that someone would walk in. Namely, terrified that Andrew would walk in. There was something to be said for the speed in which he changed, leaving Nicky staring at him for an accusing moment as he shook his head. Kevin huffed softly. What was he looking at? This wouldn’t be a problem if they were playing a home game, where there were stalls. But no. This was an away game because showing up at Palmetto would “draw attention” to them and be “unprofessional.” As if sneaking around like a pair of teenagers trying to avoid curfew was professional. Perhaps his Lord needed a dictionary next time he saw him, as opposed to a willing servant. Not that he minded that much, either.

They won, of course they won. With Kevin and Neil together, they were almost unstoppable. Pair that with Andrew’s skill and a lesser skilled team of Ravens and they were very impressive. Their biggest competition now was the trojans, because they had Jean. Kevin changed out once press duty was over and the rest of his team were out of the room. Nicky helped keep them distracted, allowing Kevin the chance to escape from the prying gaze of their goalie into the home team’s locker room, searching until he came across Ichirou, lounging on a sofa in the break room with a smirk, clearly having requested privacy. And what Ichirou wanted, he got.

Kevin approached him slowly, before lowering himself to his knees in front of him, looking up as the man’s lips curled into a smirk. To anyone else, it would look cruel, but Kevin could see an underlying warmness that didn’t help the anticipation he felt for what was to come. A shiver shot down his spine as he met the man’s gaze, catching his lower lip between his teeth.

Ichirou extended a hand into his hair, tugging on the curls lightly as he scanned Kevin, head tipping back and to the side just slightly enough for him to watch Kevin. He always watched with an air of forced indifference that made the other want to break the mask he hid behind, but he couldn’t explain that. He just wrote it down to Ichirou being the one to give him what he wanted without questioning him. Or without judgement.

“Did you wear what I requested.”

Texts and phone calls didn’t do that voice justice. It was smooth, sliding over him similar to the bourbon he knew his Lord drank. He shivered slightly and closed his eyes for a moment, nodding slightly. But he knew that was the incorrect way to answer, as well as he knew that Ichirou wouldn’t ask again.

“Yes, My Lord, I wore them.”

“Show me.”

Kevin swallowed thickly and looked at him for a moment. Then he stood, removing his clothes slowly, purposefully, keeping his gaze on the man in front of him. He flushed slightly as he stood in the lacy underwear. He still wasn’t used to such openness, not like this, and especially not with men. It was easier to be straight. It was always easier to be straight. Even if Kevin had known he wasn’t… It had been drilled into him.

“You are thinking too hard.”

He was always thinking too hard for Ichirou, but he couldn’t just turn it off! He had a constant stream of thoughts he didn’t want, and it was disturbing every time. It wasn’t just something he could turn off, not alone.

“Hands behind your back.” The order was firm, but not cruel. Never cruel.

Kevin obeyed with ease, closing his eyes for a few seconds, recalibrating himself as the man walked around him. He felt the material before he knew what it was, blinking in surprise, but not moving.

“I am going to tie your hands. Colour?”

“Green, My Lord.”

A finger traced down his spine, pausing just before his buttocks and grasping his wrists, looping the tie around them. And then he was back around at Kevin’s front, running a finger over his collar bone. Kevin watched Ichirou, green meeting dark brown in a clash of colour and personalities that couldn’t be more different. Kevin swallowed at the depth he saw in them, averting his gaze submissively and biting his lip. He saw him move, felt the hand on his jaw before he was helped to the back of the sofa, being bent over it slowly.

“I have a few things I would like to do to you… However, we do not have too much time, so I shall pick one of those things, and save the rest for next time. I find myself rather intrigued with possibilities. You will have to visit me soon.”

“Yes, My Lord. I’d like that.”

“I know… “

“Safe word?”

“Raven, My Lord.”

“Good… Colour?”

“Green, My Lord.”

Kevin couldn’t see what he was doing, he was focused on listening, a blindfold tied expertly around his head. Ichirou had decided it was the best way to keep tabs on how Kevin was responding to him, the best way to keep his attention focused. He supposed it was working, to an extent. Except Kevin was only half focused on the words, instead completely focused on the formation of his words. With every little thing Ichirou said, Kevin fell deeper into the trap of that gentle rise and fall of words that worked over every fibre of his being. Kevin fell.

And falling was easy.

Harder was the realisation that he was being caught. He was held up above the water in an array of light and comfort he’d never been allowed before.

And there was that voice.

He couldn’t differentiate between the letters, but there was the soft tones that had him following the voice, wanting to hear more, to identify the sounds better.

Kevin tuned into the words when they moved closer to his ear, whispering about what he was going to do next. He was certain he told him a detailed something about what to expect, but it was forgotten as soon as he fell silent, because of course he was. He shuddered as large hands smoothed over his skin and he swallowed heavily, whining quietly and arching into the touch instinctively, complaining in a rush of quiet noises as he squirmed, whining softly and biting his lip. More. He wanted more.

But it was over too quickly and he could pinpoint the exact moment that his disappointed huff prompted the rush of breath as his lord stifled a laugh. He wished he hadn’t stifled that laugh, he would’ve liked to hear it. There was… there was something about his Lord’s demeanour that made Kevin want to break it down in the same way Ichirou did for him.

 

There was something to be said about the next few days. Andrew was in a mood because of Kevin’s sudden disappearance after their last game and tensions were higher than ever. It was for that reason that Kevin often found himself sitting with Nicky, and when they were left alone – as rarely as that happened – they were able to talk freely. Kevin truly found himself wishing he’d begun to talk to Nicky more before. Having an actual friend around really kept his spirits high, especially when he was missing Ichirou.

It was a strange sensation, made worse by the unrelenting nagging in the back of his mind. It was _weird_ to miss Ichirou, right? Missing him, being so attached to him, wishing he was around at every moment? It wasn’t normal. How could it be normal?

He remembered asking Nicky that one morning in the kitchen. They’d been sitting at the island in the centre of the kitchen after a night at Eden’s, and he’d brought it up. Nicky had watched him with a searching gaze. Kevin almost missed the way his lips twitched into a secret smile for a moment, but catching the tail-end made him narrow his eyes suspiciously at the young man.

“You talk about him like I talk about Erik.”

Kevin’s eyes had narrowed at Nicky and he’d shaken his head. No. He refused to believe the possibility of this. He _refused_. It couldn’t be, because that would cross a line into their agreement, he was sure! There had to be some sort of rule against falling in love with one’s _Lord._ Besides, it wasn’t love! It was just… affection. They were close. Of course they were. No one had sexual relations with people they weren’t close to except drunkards and idiots.

“I don’t.”

Nicky’s hands had raised in submission, a direct contradiction to the almost sharp grin on his face. Kevin huffed, turning away from him. He knew when he’d lost a battle and no way was he getting into this one with Andrew and Neil so close.

It gave Kevin something to think about, at least.


	6. Chapter 6

Nicky hadn’t let the conversation drop. If anything, Kevin was sure that he was getting more persistent as time moved on. Some part of Kevin was almost grateful for it honestly. It kept his mind off of everything else that was bothering him by keeping his attention on trying to shut Nicky up.

“You’re like a girl with a crush.”

“Shut up!”

Laughter permeated the air as Nicky gave him a playful shove. Kevin gladly returned it, a snicker trying to force through his teeth. He couldn’t let it. He closed his eyes as best he could, shaking his head in his amusement. Nicky was good to be around. The relief of not having to censor himself around one person was nice, even if he spent most of the practises yelling at everyone and trying not to think of His Lord.

 _His_ Lord. Ichi…

 _Lord,_ he missed him. It really wasn’t fair! Why couldn’t he see him more regularly? Just because they had to sneak around because Kevin was too chicken to say anything to anyone. But Nicky knew why. They’d guessed how Andrew would react, and Kevin wasn’t eager to deal with that. At the very least, not while he still had to be around Andrew all the time.

A nudge in the centre of his ribs had a sharp squeak pulling from him as he blinked at the man beside him.

“Fuck was that for?”

He followed the nod Nicky gave to Andrew and Neil walking their way. Ah. He nudged him lightly, gratefully. He supposed he should deal with this now, honestly, before it got worse. But he wouldn’t, and he knew he wouldn’t. He didn’t want to.

Still! Practice went with little problems, save for screaming at people who didn’t perform well enough for his high standards. He knew it annoyed him more now that the stakes seemed higher. For Neil at least. Kevin had to remind himself sometimes that his debt was different now. He forgot how his situation with began sometimes.

Heck, he forgot when it began. It felt like something that had been going on forever. It felt like something as natural as breathing. Ichirou made him feel like he could breathe. He felt normal around him, like none of the bad things had happened. Giving up his control made him feel more alive than most things managed to lately. Giving away his free reign made him feel like he could breathe easier, like he was floating.

Not having to worry about the constricting weight constant on his chest freed up so much time for him. Since Ichirou, he’d been able to find time for himself outside of exy. He’d nearly forgotten his love of history, and yet last time he saw Ichi, they sat for supper, and he’d let Kevin all but lecture on any topic that came to mind. And there had been a few.

He missed him.

He could admit that without doubting his entire being. When Ichirou wasn’t around, he could always feel the nagging feeling of being alone stronger than ever. It was made better by the knowledge that Nicky was there. But even with that it was lonely when Ichirou wasn’t around.

“You love him!”

“I do not.”

“You do! You love him!”

 

 

“Raven.”

He couldn’t focus. He couldn’t get conversations out of his head and nothing Ichirou was doing was getting him to fall. He knew Ichirou didn’t like when he was drifting from their activities, so he called it off. He immediately felt the hands pull off of him and Ichirou was helping him to the sofa in his office, sitting him down and offering him water as he ran his fingers through Kevin’s hair.

It really didn’t help the thoughts running through his head about Lord Moriyama and how he viewed his feelings about him. Not that Kevin had expected it to. But perhaps if Ichi- His Lord wasn’t so attentive and kind to him, it wouldn’t cause quite as much trouble in the way of making him question his feelings. Not that it was Ichirou’s fault he was doing that. But it kind of was.

Kevin shuddered slightly as hands worked over his shoulders gently, trying to work out tension he didn’t even know was there himself. He couldn’t help the sigh that escaped him as he sipped at the cup of water he’d been given, knowing that he shouldn’t drink too quickly.

“What is wrong, Kevin?”

If only he could read into his Lord’s words better than this. If he knew what he was really thinking, it would make everything so much easier. But that was another impossibility in a long list of things Kevin couldn’t do.

A shrug.

Silence.

“I’ve just been thinking a lot. I thought that maybe you could help get my mind off it but…”

But Ichirou was only succeeding in making it worse.

He could feel the searching gaze on him, skin prickling under the attentiveness of the Lord as he scanned him for an answer Kevin hoped he wouldn’t find. It felt like a sure-fire way to get the contract dissolved. He didn’t want that. He was sure his confusion would go away soon. It had to. He couldn’t just give up of this.

“I will refrain from pressing. I am glad you stopped our activities for the day. I dislike when your focus is elsewhere.”

Kevin knew. And he’d been unwilling to risk what’d happen if Ichirou had realised he was spaced out for the wrong reasons. In theory, he knew that the punishment wouldn’t be that bad. But there was always the nagging feeling that the contract would be cancelled at any point he wasn’t paying the proper attention to His Lord. This was fine.

He leant against Ichirou gently, closing his eyes and trying not to dwell on what he and Nicky had discussed. It wasn’t about that right now. He just wanted to enjoy the other’s presence. It wasn’t long before he could feel fingers carding through his hair, resting against the man’s shoulder as he sighed faintly, shaking his head a tiny bit. He was comfortable like this. Ichirou was comfortable to be around. Kevin turned his head into the man’s shoulder gently, inhaling his scent and feeling the tug of sleep. His fingers curled into the fabric of Ichirou’s shirt gently.

“Rest.”

He knew that voice. It was the same one that left no room for argument. It was his favourite tone, and one Kevin couldn’t help but obey.

 

He awoke in Ichirou’s room, head turned into the pillow as he was surrounded by his scent. The realisation brought a small smile to his lips before his eyes even opened, he smiled faintly and nuzzled his face into the pillow with a soft sigh. He hummed quietly and just stayed there for a while.

When he sat up, he found the note on the nightstand, detailing the time Ichirou would finish with his meetings. Checking the clock, he ran his fingers along the paper. Okay. So Ichirou had finished meetings an hour ago. Which meant he’d be tying up any loose ends. Kevin stood up, laying the not on the table again. He stretched, eyes flickering closed for a second as he composed himself before turning and sauntering from the room.

 

He arrived at the office, walking in without a word. He was long past knocking. Ichirou was alone, talking on the phone in clipped tones. His back was to the door, thankfully, even though he must’ve known someone came in. Which meant he’d know it was Kevin. That wouldn’t stop him. He smirked mischievously and padded over to Ichirou’s chair, loosening the buttons of his shirt.

Placing a hand on the back of the chair, he spun it, just as Ichi was – once again – explaining something that he must’ve thought simple. The tone of his voice, at least, indicated the person on the other end of the phone was an idiot. That didn’t stop the way his fingers dipped into the waistband of his pants as Kevin climbed over him, awkward for a few moments as he worked out how to place his legs.

He leant down without a word, kisses working over the man’s neck as he continued to talk on the phone. He’d be in trouble for this, he was sure. But he couldn’t help it! He wanted to. And he’d spent so long dwelling on everything. He wanted to forget. Kevin smirked a bit as the man gripped his waistband tighter, taking the initiative to grind down onto him with a soft, breathy moan in his ear.

He took great satisfaction in the way His Lord’s breath hitched, and he braced himself on his shoulders, using them as leverage to move against Ichirou. He took great enjoyment in the knowledge that it was _him_ provoking such sounds from His Lord.

“Ichi…”

The name was out of him in the midst of a soft moan without him even thinking, and he froze, swallowing heavily as His Lord put down the phone with a soft click.

“Kneel,” he ordered without pause. “We will discuss this after.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

Such was the life of someone so firmly planted in the limelight. Kevin watched Ichirou go to event after event after event. He knew he didn’t like it, Ichirou had told him as much. He didn’t like flying, either, another thing he’d made a point to tell Kevin one day. He couldn’t help but smile as Ichirou burst into the bedroom one day, complaining about the upcoming charity gala he’d been roped into.

“Come with me.”

Kevin startled, almost falling off the bed at the suddenness of the request. He blinked at Ichirou in a mix of surprise and happiness. He hated being left alone when the Moriyama was going about his business. It wasn’t fair.

“I already have a suit for you.”

Okay. So maybe it was less request than order, but there was a slight grimace that tugged at Ichi’s lip that suggested maybe he hadn’t meant it to sound that way. Kevin fought back a smile, bowing his head slightly.

“Of course I would be delighted to accompany you to the upcoming charity gala, Lord Moriyama.”

“You do not have to call me that. I would prefer you resisted, actually. It is all I will be hearing when we make our appearance.”

Kevin had to laugh at that. It would be an unexpected request if he didn’t know what Ichirou was like. And recently – since his slip up, that was – he’d found out that Ichirou preferred not to be addressed like his father had been. He only kept it up as it was an important tradition or something like that. And only when he couldn’t find a way out of being Lord Moriyama for the evening.

Kevin supposed he could understand in some way. Since Riko’s death, the press had taken to bringing up his mother’s, relating the deaths somehow to the _‘accident’_ that had been the demise of Kayleigh Day. It would’ve been enough to drive Kevin back to the bottle if not for Ichirou. He and Riko had been nothing like Kayleigh and Tetsuji. And if they had, then Kevin was _thrilled_ that the Day house had won the battle this time.

He nodded at Ichirou and smiled at him slightly. He couldn’t wait to actually be included in this. He hated being left alone, honestly. It was difficult, not something he dealt with often.

“Already bought me a suit though? Presumptuous, aren’t we?”

“Sassing me again, Day?”

“Not at all, My Lord.”

Ichirou’s lips quirked into the slightest of smirks. Kevin might not have even noticed, had he not been so accustomed to his Lord’s micro expressions. If anything, he might’ve seemed to get irritated at the comment, but Kevin knew better. Kevin could see the amusement in his features. He watched him enough to make out the tiniest of changes to his demeanour.

Ichirou stepped aside to allow Kevin to view the suit. He couldn’t withhold the gasp that escaped at his shock upon seeing the quite obviously hand-tailored garment.

“Ichi… I can’t take this!”

“You can, and you will. I insist. If you are to be my guest, you are to look the part.”

“Fuck… just put be in a dress and call me Lady Moriyama.”

He barely had time to react before he found himself pinned to the bed by a smirking man, biting his lip as he gazed up at him, almost innocent but for the slight arch of his brow as he wiggled under the man, testing his grip.

He didn’t need to. As always, Ichirou’s grip held fast as ever, a mocking grin passing over handsome features as he pressed Kevin’s crossed wrists into the mattress below him. He tipped his chin up a bit in a silent offer, a soft moan lost between them as Kevin arched up into the searing kiss he was caught in.

As always, the rest of the evening passed in a rush, punctuated by quiet begging, and many checks by Ichirou to make sure Kevin was okay.

 

The night of the gala came around and Ichirou was lingering in the door of the bathroom in the hotel they were renting. His gaze followed Kevin in the mirror as he desperately tried to avoid it. Ichirou was devastatingly distracting, and it was quite disorienting when Kevin was trying to get into the suit. He tried to ignore the other’s approach, a feat easier said than done when he suddenly felt lips against his throat, making his head lull to the side.

“Ichi… This isn’t fair, you shouldn’t.”

“You look good in the suit.”

“People will talk if I appear all bruised up.”

“True… Let them.”

“Ichi!”

He felt the rush of air from the soft laugh as the other pulled back, agreeing with him. Kevin wanted to pull him close again, and just stay in the hotel, hidden together, all night. He knew that was unrealistic, but it didn’t stop him from being disgruntled when he pulled away, trying to regain his composure as his hands ran down the suit.

Ichirou extended an arm, walking him to their waiting car and once inside, he sat in near silence, only adding to the conversation where necessary. Kevin exhaled softly, clasping the man’s arm gently and squeezing.

“Does this make me a trophy wife for the night?”

“You, brat, are on thin ice.”

“Sorry. You’re the trophy wife.”

The glare he received was worth it, even at the promised punishment behind dark eyes. A slight smirk flashed over his face and he tilted his head, almost innocent as he gazed at His Lord. He bit back a giggle, watching the man for his reaction.

“The invitation is in my name. You are the trophy.”

Satisfaction hit him like a freight train as the man sunk to his level. It was always great to make him lose track of himself, even if he’d pay for it later – or whatever Ichi’s threat of the day was.

The gala… was not what either of the men could’ve predicted. Stepping out of the car meant getting blinded by a flash of lights and deafened by a wave of shouts that neither of them had predicted. The word ‘live’ was painted across a camera in red and the lights kept flashing. Kevin forced a smile onto his face, the same one he used for interviews, and let the relief of not climbing out of the car touching His Lord wash over him.

“Shall I shoot them for you?”

“Ichirou!”

“Really, just say the word.”

Kevin couldn’t help it, he shot a look of admiration at his lord, watching him affectionately. He didn’t even realise that the cameras were still going, focused on Ichirou entirely.

He exhaled and shook his head, and they walked into the party. Side by side, just as it was meant to be.


	8. Chapter 8

“I do not recall any appointments being booked today.”

Ichirou’s hand smoothed through Kevin’s hair, delicately brushing through his curls as his head laid in his lap, a small smile on his face fading away as he listened to the man’s words turning sharp as the person on the other line explained the situation to him. Kevin sighed softly, reaching up a hand and touching Ichirou’s face gently, receiving a strained smile that told him all he needed to know. He’d been ignoring calls from Andrew since two days ago at the banquet. He wasn’t surprised about the calls, but he really didn’t feel like being screamed at.

“They are causing problems downstairs.”

Oh. Great. He didn’t need a name, he knew who that meant. He knew. Ignoring Andrew’s calls often resulted in unwanted ‘visits’ during which he would lecture you about ignoring him. Kevin extended a hand to play with Ichirou’s fingers.

“Remember when I said I wasn’t scared of you? When I called you safe? Please don’t let that be poor judgement on my part.”

“Should I be concerned that your friends scare you more than me?”

“Only if it concerns My Lord,” he whispered with a teasing grin, pulling his hand to his lips and kissing the tips of his fingers gently.

The cheeky comment earned him a light swat, but Kevin just laughed, pressing his lips against Ichirou’s bicep before feeling him nudge him.

“I doubt they will go away any time soon. We must go.”

Kevin groaned but got up reluctantly, tugging on his shirt and some pants, waiting for Ichirou to get his entire three piece suit on and honestly, if that didn’t sum up his Lord in one action, he didn’t know what did. Kevin reached for him, unsure how this would go, so he reached out for the lapels of Ichirou’s suit jacket, yanking him into a demanding kiss briefly.

Kevin Day braced himself and went to face the music.

 

Ichirou was close behind him, walking with all the pride of a Moriyama as Kevin walked down to the entrance of their home… his… home. Not Kevin’s. He had to remember that. This was just a contract… Just… that.

Andrew was brandishing a newspaper with a dark glare. All the fury of everything he wanted to say written in the lines of his face, a very terrifying promise written on his face that made Kevin shrink back against Ichi. Fuck. This wasn’t good.

“Kevin Day, what a day, you’ve a lot of explaining to do,” he snarled at him, throwing the paper down on a two page spread featuring two photos.

The first was one of Kevin gazing at Ichirou just as they were walking down the red carpet, a soft smile on his face that he’d never seen on himself before. He gestured to it with a faint smile. He liked that one. If they could track down the person that took it, he’d like a print. He’d have to ask Ichi later. The second was just a bit more curious, a picture of Kevin with his hand on the Lord’s leg, and honestly, how had they gotten that one? They’d been sat away from everyone. Neil was off to the side with a frown on his face, and Kevin was somewhat glad to see that he didn’t seem as angry about this. It wouldn’t change Andrew’s mind though…

“Please, do come in.”

Upon Ichirou’s invitation, Andrew stalked forward, grabbing Kevin’s wrist

“You are an ungrateful coward, Day. After Neil gave you a chance to get your life back you threw it back in his face by running back to him?”

Kevin bristled, not at all a fan of Andrew’s accusations, nor his tone. Ichirou was generous, and kind… So kind. He looked at the man in question, close enough to brush his hand against his, smiling faintly at the way Ichirou’s fingers twitched a bit, as if he was fighting the urge to grab Kevins hand. He wouldn’t have minded. Ichirou could do what he liked… Kevin would accept it from him. He really would.

Kevin would do a lot of things for Ichirou.

“Andrew, I apologise if you feel any sort of way about me and My Lord, but I fail to see how any of this is your business. If I’d wanted you to know, I would’ve said something when I was with you,” he scoffed softly, shaking his head.

Andrew glared, Kevin just blinked.

“After all we have done for you. Kevin. We are going home.”

“Then go. I am staying here.”

“Kevin.”

It was Neil that spoke up, looking at him closely to see what he could identify on Kevin’s face. There was more going on here, and Andrew just refused to look past what he wanted to see. Kevin had never before been so pleased with Neil’s astute observation skills, but also, never so frustrated with them. He didn’t like the way he was scrutinizing him and with Andrew still raging about Kevin’s refusal to come to heel, it wasn’t any easier.

“If you don’t come back with us, this is over.”

“Okay. I don’t care. Sure, this started because I tried to get Neil and Jean off the hook. I entered a contract because I wanted someone who could help me get my life on track. I entered the contract because My Lord knows how to control things. Unlike you. You’re a petulant child that didn’t even notice I wasn’t around most of the time. You left me alone after the death of someone I once would have died for, and left me hung out to dry because you have _Neil_ so why would you need anyone else? I tell you why. Because you’re a control freak. Except the only time you care is when one of your toys doesn’t want to play anymore.”

Neil was staring at him, mouth agape as he tried to piece together the fact that Kevin was… growing a spine? Well that took long enough. Andrew’s face was reddening in anger, and Kevin knew, once, he might’ve been scared.

“You are an ungrateful coward, Kevin Day. You had the chance to get your life back and you threw it away.”

Threw it away? Had he? Was it really throwing it away if he was… happy? And he was. Truly. He could easily say he’d not been happy like this for the longest time. He’d been in the shadows behind Andrew and Neil. He’d been in the shadows behind Riko before then, and hidden in his mother’s even earlier than that. He was destined for a greatness that everyone tried to keep him from only to realise that – when it came down to it – he didn’t want what he’d been groomed into.

“My life? Or the one that you and everyone else laid out for me? You didn’t _care_ about me. You didn’t care about anything. Exy? No. Me? No. You just wanted to control something, whether it was your life or mine. And I am done with it. I don’t even want that. And I don’t want you.”

“You want him? He won’t be your sugar daddy forever. He’ll get bored. Just like everyone else around you. And then you’ll run back to us…”

“Andrew.”

Kevin’s gaze turned on Neil for the first time, scanning the boy in front of him, looking at what he’d become. He was glad, for the first time, that Neil had gotten away. Neil showed strength beyond his years and it worked with the biting words and harshness of Andrew because he was used to that world. Kevin wasn’t. Even at Riko’s worse there’d been more than pain and hatred. And now those feelings had moved onto a far more… caring source.

“I want to serve my Lord. And I would like you to leave.”

 

Movement. Space. A presence no longer comfortingly beside him.

Kevin turned around, a frown building on his face as he shook his head. Something wasn’t right. Ichirou wasn’t by his side anymore, rather moving a few feet away. The distance immediately tore Kevin’s attention from the boys in front of him. A frown played on his face as he looked at the man, head tilting a bit as he felt Andrew’s hand close around his wrist, though he dared not move yet.

“Ichi?”

The fury was written over delicate features for something Kevin was unsure about. He didn’t think he’d said anything out of line, but it was definitely directed at him, else Ichirou would’ve still been at his side. Why wasn’t he at his side.

“Neil Josten, your name change does not protect you from your fate. You are Moriyama property and dare to come into my house and allow your mutt to insult me, insult Kevin? You throw my kindness in my face?”

Ichirou’s tone never changed, but his demeanour was far more cutting than the mildness of his words would suggest. There was a rigidity in the way he stood, more than Kevin usually saw in these more recent times. He frowned a bit, waiting patiently.

It didn’t take long for Ichirou to turn his attention to him, and he offered a smile that was met with an icy stare that only served to make him uncomfortable.

“I release you from your debt effective immediately. Get out of my house.” The words were Japanese, enough to stop the others understanding while still managing to cut through Kevin’s entire being and leave him shattered on the ground.

He watched the man walk away, struggling to breathe even as he heard the cock of a gun before it was lowered. Ichirou’s doing he was certain. It all felt like it was happening in slow motion, like everything he was doing and feeling was imploding in on him as realisation after realisation dropped his universe on top of him. Andrew’s fingers dropped his arm, and words he didn’t listen to were exchanged.

No… No… No no no… Ichirou could not do this to him! He couldn’t just walk away from him! That wasn’t fair! Kevin was moving before he truly realised what he was doing, ignoring the click of the safety on a gun to his left. But they’d always underestimated him. Ichirou’s guards considered him little more threatening than a kitten.

That proved to be a mistake as the guard closest to him wound up with an elbow in his stomach and the gun exchanging hands, Kevin flicking the safety back on and tossing it aside. The commotion was enough to get attention. In the wake of all of this, he was acting in reckless desperation, sprinting towards his Lord as fast as he could, security hot on his tail.

His mistake was slowing down enough to stop running into Ichirou, getting forced to his knees with a gun to his head in the moments Ichirou turned around, staring at him. Kevin could _see_ the surprise behind his carefully practiced mask. He swallowed hesitantly as he looked up at the man before him. Vaguely aware of the barrel of the gun on his temple as Andrew and Neil’s eyes on his back, his focus was almost entirely on Lord Moriyama.

“Leave him.”

Ichirou would never understand the way air filled his lungs again as he heard those words again, half convinced the Lord – _his_ Lord – would let them shoot him for his disobedience. He swallowed heavily, gazing up at the man before him.

“Ensure his friends leave the premises. Peacefully.”

Alone at last, Ichirou stared at Kevin with a slight air of what Kevin could only describe as awe. The mask cracked and Kevin couldn’t help a tiny smile forming on his lips as he watched the emotion visibly flood his Lord’s face.

 

It felt like they’d been in that position for an age before the stillness was broken. But this was a conversation that needed to be had. Kevin’s head dipped, lowering towards the ground as he extended a hand to his Lord. To _Ichirou._

“Let me stay. I don’t want to leave.”

“I released your debt.”

“Then let me stay.”

Kevin stood up slowly, until he was looking down ever so slightly at Ichirou, stepping forward and extending a hand to him, brushing his fingers along his jaw as their eyes met. A small smile stretched across his lips and he sighed softly.

“This hasn’t been about my debt for a while, Ichirou,” Kevin’s fingers worked down the other’s neck, eyes fixed on the flinch that came with his fingers drifting over his pulse point. “I _want_ to stay.”

“Then stay, Kevin.”

He needed to hear it. He’d wanted to hear it. The break down of the debt into a raging desire they could both feel, no longer pressed into boxes of ‘him’ and ‘I’ but rather a _home_ in which the central force was ‘us.’ He launched himself at his Lord, wrapping his arms around him and half lifting him from the ground. Kevin _lived_ for the huff of laughter he received in response as Ichirou’s arms locked around his neck.

It wasn’t about a debt anymore. It was about them.

 

“I love you, Ichirou Moriyama.”

“And I, you, Kevin Day.”

 


End file.
